tied up and twisted

Okay so aside from a quick post I made a week or so ago about my experience with Irene, the hurricane, I haven’t been blogging much. It seems that it is very hard these days to find time to write (unless I am getting paid for it) or to even get my nails done or my hair cut and don’t even get me started on daily showers.

I am not going to apologize for this because every mom knows that there are certain things that come first and at the rate our kids grow up we have to take every minute we can to spend quality time with them.

I hate working full time an hour from my house. It means that 11 hours a day are spent away from my daughter 5 days a week. I will not spend any of my time off away from her because of this so my hair is getting scraggly, my roots are showing, and my nails are definitely showing some wear.

It’s okay though, Dani doesn’t care about that kind of stuff. If she even remembers parts of this time it will be that her momma was there and when she wasn’t her grammy was.

I know the day will come soon that she will need to be in daycare, thankfully I have found one that I trust and that only charges by the hour. Daycare should be beneficial to promoting her social skills to since she won’t always be the center of attention like she is with me and my family and friends.

But for the first time in my life I would gladly trade my independence and ability to earn my own money for the chance to be a stay-at-home mom for the next 3-4 years. I understand why some women, and men, do this. I feel like I miss so much being away from her 55 hours a week and I just want to spend every moment of every day watching her and learning from her and teaching her.

Hopefully soon I will feel better about the fact that I have to work, but for now, I spend every moment I can with my infant daughter hoping to increase the chances that she will know I am her momma. But should anyone know of any wealthy men out there who need a live in cook/housekeeper/whatever in exchange for support and health insurance please let me know asap!!!


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