not enough, never too much

Again it has been months since my last blog, well other than the advent book calendar photo I posted last night here.

When I first started this blog I wanted to keep it just about my mommy side and leave all the other sides of me out, like relationships and work, but I am finding that isn’t easy to do.  Mainly because I am not just all the different parts of me separately – I am the sum of all those parts together.

So I can’t just blog about those parts separate when the whole of me is what makes me who I am.

I am not just a mom.

I am not just a lover.

I am not just a friend.

I am not just a writer.

I am not just anything…

I am all.

And thus, I have decided to blog here about something that I have been fighting with my whole life – this neat little box that society seems to want to force all women into.

You see, I don’t fit in that box.

I am not soft-spoken.

I almost never wear makeup nor high heels.

I hate pantyhose and will only wear pants in cold weather.

I like sci-fi, action, and thriller movies and not usually dramas.

I like to smoke a cigar every once in a while, especially during a hurricane or a blues festival.

And I am tired of pretending that there is a little shred of me that fits society’s definition of what is appropriate for women because there really isn’t. I won’t be forced into one of those neat little compartments.

All women are different.

All women are people.

And just like men, we have desires and dreams and needs.

Women can’t be sorted and grouped into “Good Women” and “Bad Women”.

We are ALL women regardless of how we dress, what we do with our time, and who we love.

So, in honor of my new found outlook on life I have created the following affirmations. And I will repeat them every day, several times a day, until they are ingrained in my very nature.

Because I deserve to be the person I am.

And I am not concerned at all by what others think of this.

It Is Okay

It is okay if I am not married. And it is okay if I am.
It is okay if I don’t want to get married. And it is okay if I do.
It is okay if I have a child and I am not married. And it is okay if I have a child and I am married.
And it is also okay if I am married and don’t have a child.
And it is also okay if I don’t want to have a child.
It is okay if I like to have sex. And it is okay if I don’t.
It is okay if I have multiple partners. And it is okay if I have only one.
And it is also okay if I have none.
It is okay if I love men. And it is okay if I love women.
And it is also okay if I love both.
And it is also okay if I love transgenders.
It is okay if I don’t wear make-up. And it is okay if I do.
It is okay if I don’t wear pink or frilly clothes. And it is okay if I do.
It is okay if I don’t feel like smiling. And it is okay if I do.

It is okay to be whoever I am because I am awesome just being me.

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3 thoughts on “not enough, never too much

  1. People are like you help things change. You seem to be awesome. I want to get to know you more….I want to be able to share your energy because I want to help spread your messages that it is ok to be different because everyone IS different and until society realizes this there will always be the need for strong people to stand up for that. And that you are definitely one of…a strong and beautiful PERSON

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