Do Not Hold On To Things

It’s hard when you go looking for something you need and you realize it was in the car that you recently had stolen. There wasn’t much in the car that was mine except 30 years of cd collecting and a coat from an ex. All of which can be replaced.

What’s most difficult, though, is explaining to your 5 year old what happened to her Frozen raincoat that she wears everywhere and all the toys that she got for her birthday that were in the car.

I have no concept of being able to get into someone else’s car and hot wiring it and then throwing everything in the car in the trash. Or their own cars, who knows. But I find it especially difficult to deal with when I think of all the stuff that was Dani’s.

She’s been amazing through all this, she just keeps telling me that maybe they needed her raincoat more than she did. Which breaks my heart even more.

This is a good time to remind myself that possessions aren’t important. That stuff, doesn’t matter.

I’ve been meditating a lot the last 10 days, trying to move past this feeling of being unsafe. I can’t even imagine myself staying overnight in the city that this happened in again, even though I have several friends in that area and I used to love to take weekend trips to the city.

I’ll get over it, soon, but I’m not sure I’ll ever feel safe in that, or any, city again. It makes me wish I’d gone south or west with my last move and not east like I did.

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