Think again, please

“Arthritis sufferers wake up with stiff joints and still get ready to start their day. Their wrists, knees, neck, hips probably hurt, but they will walk or drive to school or work anyway. They will feel close to debilitating pain throughout the day, but they will grit their teeth and get through it to get the job done. That’s what it takes to live a life with chronic joint pain.”

Before you judge my choice of medication, remember that the above is EVERY single morning/day of my life. And, oh man, if it rains or is threatening to storm, the pain/ stiffness is debilitating even for me… the woman who walked into OB in full labor and was told I couldn’t be in labor because I was cracking jokes.

No, I just have built up a tremendous tolerance for pain.

I tried pills prescribed by my doctor for pain/depression and 3 years ago was diagnosed with GERD and “a stomach full of holes” (as my doctor so nicely described it). And as long as I continue taking daily pills, I will have to also take 40mg of Prilosec daily (another $50 a month in big pharma’s pocket). <– see a pattern yet?

Since becoming a medical marijuana card holder 3 years ago, I have been able to lower my daily intake of pills from 9 to 4 and I take less than 15 pills a year for pain… oh, and fyi it’s usually for cramps not arthritis.

Yes, I occasional roll a joint to smoke on my back steps but usually I vape it, drink it, or use cannabis infused topicals so please don’t worry about my lungs… or the air.

I am happy. And not completely pain free, I never will be.

But I can work.

And I can walk.

And I can get down on the floor and play with my child.

And the holes in my stomach are gone.

So, please, before you judge me… just don’t. Because I don’t give a flying fuck.


It’s Not the Same

So lately I’ve been seeing posts about a woman who was arrested for sending 65,000 text messages to a guy she met on line and went on one date with.


Well, there was a lot more to it than than 65,000 text messages.

She not only threatened him with a knife but she broke into his house and took a bath. I’m not a psychologist but I’d say she’s probably suffering from at least one psychological disorder.

No. This doesn’t excuse her behavior. In fact, I’m not even going to try and excuse her behavior. That is not the point of my post today.

I’ve heard lately from a few men, how they feel uncomfortable with meeting women because of this. Uncomfortable = scared, maybe?

Anyway, yes so every so often we see stories like this… so called “crazy women” stalking men. And yes, it happens.

But… it happens a hell of a lot more to women. According to the National Domestic Violence hotline, it happens at least 3xs more to women than to men.

1 in 4 women (24.3%) and 1 in 7 men (13.8%) aged 18 and older in the United States have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime.[iv]

In this case, this woman was/is probably mentally ill and not just violent. And in some cases of domestic violence by a man against a woman, he may have been mentally ill as well.

But we cannot ignore the fact that men in America are substantially more violent and aggressive than women, especially to intimate partners.

In contrast to men, the killing of a woman by a stranger was rare (RR = 0.18). More than twice as many women were shot and killed by their husband or intimate acquaintance than were murdered by strangers using guns, knives, or any other means. Although women comprise more than half the U.S. population, they committed only 14.7% of the homicides noted during the study interval.

So please, enough with the crazy woman who sent 65,000 texts. Men in America seem to be more worried that their on – line match is going to be fat or hairy in places they don’t want.

When I meet a guy for the first time, I’m more worried he’s going to rape or kill me so FUCK this crazy woman bullshit!

For Obvious Reasons

So a few weeks ago I met a man on-line and we seemed to hit it off so I gave him my cell number. The cell number is a test… 9 times out of 10 if there is any hesitation about giving up a phone number, there’s a reason, and it’s usually a bad one. One they feel necessary to lie about or hide at least.

Sometimes they hesitate because they’re international but I’ve still found that the guys I want to get to know, even the international ones, will still NOT hesitate about giving you their phone number.

Anyway, after I had this guy’s cell number I was able to find out his last name and then search the local court records. There aren’t too many things that I look for but the two main ones are DV (Domestic Violence) charges and failure to pay child support. These are two big RED flags for me and should be for any female thinking about meeting up in person with a male they only know on-line.

Another bit of info I request is their birthday, to ensure I have the correct person when I search court records. This new guy showed up in search results with two different (8 years apart) DV charges so I, obviously, realized this wasn’t going to work out. I have been on the receiving end of that in previous relationships and won’t be going back.

After telling him “No, thank you” twice, I finally just said “I found your DV record. Please don’t contact me again.”

He responds, “You weren’t going to get the chance to go out with me anyway. For obvious reasons.”

Well, actually, the reasons weren’t obvious then, and still aren’t, but unfortunately it’s a typical reaction from a DV repeat offender to attack women.

My Harley

I first fell in love with this little guy when I met him at one of my best friend’s house who had rescued him from another friend’s farm. When I asked my friend the cat’s name, I was told “free kitty”. Apparently he was already a trouble maker and was tormenting my friend’s other kitty constantly and relentlessly.

But this 14 pound tom cat had me from his first “meow”. I was completely smitten with him and his friendly nature so I went home that night with a plan to convince my live-in boyfriend to let me get a 3rd cat.

Well, in my defense, our second cat, Samantha was totally his, lol. She didn’t leave his side. And when he died, I think a part of her died with him.

Anyway, it was super easy to come up with a name for him… He was named after the very loud, very muscular, very bad boy Harley Davidson motorcycle. And he truly lived up to his name.

He wasn’t like any other cat I’ve ever known, more part cat, part dog, part best friend.

Harley spent 15 years with me though 5 different homes and even more boyfriends. And he was always the man of my house.

When I got pregnant with Dani, he used to sleep on my belly to be close to her. And although after she was born he kept his distance due to noise and having fitfuls of his fur grabbed at the most inopportune moments, he loved her because she was mine.

And if there’s ever been a man’s love that I absolutely knew was complete and unconditional, it was Harley’s love for me.

But yesterday I had to send my best friend, my familiar, and the man in my life back to the stars.

I miss you my little man, you will forever be in my heart. And Dani and I will always look for you in the night sky… our very furry, orange guardian angel. Rest in peace.