Boxes

My whole life has been placed into boxes. Not necessarily by me… or by ONLY me… but neat little “can’t stray from the norm, don’t let them see you not be the pretty princess” boxes.

But I’m not a pretty princess. 

I never have been. 

I’m a “fucking drop dead gorgeous when I want to be and still stunning in my own beautiful way even when I’m not trying to be” woman, but I’ve never been a pretty princess… not to anyone except my father that is. 

And I’ve definitely never fit into anyone’s neat and tidy little boxes. Ever. I’m a mess. Completely. I always have been. 

I embrace it most of the time. But I didn’t always. 

Over the last few years, mostly because I’m trying to figure out what kind of mom I want to be, I’ve started unpacking those boxes… oh who am I kidding… I started throwing that shit out of those boxes left and right. All over the fucking place. 

Some of you know this because you’ve been here… Lol

Anyway, things have settled down mostly… kind of… as much as they can when you have an active 6 year old… so now I’m “unpacking” one last box… My relationship box. 

Over the last three months I’ve opened my mind a bit more and have allowed my relationships to become what they would become naturally, instead of trying to force them into these neat and tidy little boxes… and I have some amazing people in my life right now. They all fulfill a certain need I have whether it’s my geeky boyfriend who takes me to see Wonder Woman or my music buff FWB who listens to Dave Matthews under the stars with me. But none of them have to give more than they want to give me. And, of course, they all know about each other… or that there are others anyway. 

I expect nothing and gain everything. 

It’s refreshing. 

I will find my own way out…

Sunday I saw my first Dave & Tim show… the Dave Matthews fans out there know what a treat that is, especially in a year that the full band is not touring. 

I’ve downloaded, and purchased, several live shows of Dave Matthews playing with Tim Reynolds so I knew it would be a bit milder than the 13 DMB concerts (yes, I realize that’s nothing to a true fan) that I’ve seen but it was really more than I expected. 

At a DMB concert I get lost in the music… There is absolutely nothing like it to me. 

I don’t know if it’s because Dave’s gotten me through so many difficult times in my life… or so many happy ones. My best memories are associated with Dave Matthews songs as are all my major relationships over the last 15 years… the one who died… the rebound man… the man who gave me my daughter… the man who tried to be a father to my daughter and failed… the man who tried to be my friend but I wouldn’t trust him… 

So many memories… so much time… so melodic a life…

Dave really is writing the soundtrack to my life. I’ve often felt connected to his music, both his words and melodies. Grey St and 41 and Dancing Nancies in particular…

“All the colors mix to grey…” 

and “I’ll go in this way and find my own way out…” 

and “Could I have been anyone other than me?”

When Leroy died and the band came out with the tribute album… and I listened to Dave put into words the grief and sadness he felt over his friend and mentor’s accidental death, I finally felt someone understood me. Not just about Dennis but about all the things I’ve lost of myself due to circumstances and coincidences of life. 

So last Sunday was magical. And more powerful than I expected of a Dave & Tim show especially with the line up of special guests who joined them on stage including Ben the Sax Guy… who held his own little concert after the show as concert goers walked to their cars and ubers.

I danced for almost three hours, barefoot in the grass, eyes closed, enjoying the sounds and smells so prominent when you are at a Dave concert… feeling the aches and pains that often accompany a night of unabashed abandon both in dancing and walking… the old friends you go with and the new friends you meet… it was, is, and will always be a spiritual mecca for me… 

For I will go in this way and find my own way out… always…

Set list from the show 😉

open up that lovely flower

#whyilovedave #happybirthdaydave

life after dani

When I first started this blog approximately 3 years ago, I used to name all my posts by using lyrics from Dave Matthews’ songs. Since then, I have modified my post naming format a bit and I tend to use varying naming conventions these days.

Tonight though, I am reverting to my DMB lyrics love because I have a very important topic I want to write about and his lyrics fit the post perfectly.

One of my favorite songs by Dave Matthews is, SURPRISE, a song about Cunnilingus.

For those of you who don’t know what cunnilingus is, click here

Dave loves to sing about loving women, especially orally… and his song “Cornbread” is a perfect example of this.

Well, a man once asked me why I would listen to Dave Matthews and not Eminem, Little Wayne, Outcast, and numerous other rap musicians that obviously sing about having sex with…

View original post 369 more words

Rock my Gypsy Soul

Today is Dave Matthews birthday… and I’m sure he doesn’t want his own song dedicated to him… so, here’s some ZBB.

Zac Brown Band opened for DMB in PNC Park in Pittsburgh one year when I went with a past college roommate. She knew of the Zac Brown Band and had already developed a love for their original style and easy jams. 

But that night was magical… and I fell in love with yet another fantastic set of musicians… thanks to Dave… and Kristi.

I’ll never forget that night, nor how wonderful and content this Mashup from Zac Brown makes me feel… so enjoy…

And Happy Birthday, Dave…

ps… this one’s for you, too… I think you know who you are…

open up that lovely flower

When I first started this blog approximately 3 years ago, I used to name all my posts by using lyrics from Dave Matthews’ songs. Since then, I have modified my post naming format a bit and I tend to use varying naming conventions these days.

Tonight though, I am reverting to my DMB lyrics love because I have a very important topic I want to write about and his lyrics fit the post perfectly.

One of my favorite songs by Dave Matthews is, SURPRISE, a song about Cunnilingus.

For those of you who don’t know what cunnilingus is, click here

Dave loves to sing about loving women, especially orally… and his song “Cornbread” is a perfect example of this.

Well, a man once asked me why I would listen to Dave Matthews and not Eminem, Little Wayne, Outcast, and numerous other rap musicians that obviously sing about having sex with women too.

Ahem.

Dave (and his band) LOVE singing about sex with women. This shows in many of their lyrics.

BUT, the difference between Dave’s lyrics and some of the other musician’s lyrics that this guy mentioned is that Dave very much makes it clear how much he respects women by how he treats them in his lyrics.

These other guys?

They seem to think calling a woman a bitch and a ho is foreplay. <deep sigh>

For example:

Dave Matthews’s “Cornbread” Lyrics 

It soars inside my soul because of you
All that innocence that you inspire
You know you are as heaven intended you
Open up that lovely flower

The love inside of your head
With the love inside my head
All that we need to make love happen

Eminem’s “Shake That”Lyrics

Three to the one from the one to the three
I met a bad bitch last night in the D
Let me tell you how I made her leave with me
Conversation and Hennessey
I’ve been to the muthafuckin’ mountain top
Heard muthafuckers talk, seen and dropped
If I ain’t got a weapon I’m a pick up a rock
And when I bust yo ass I’m a continue to rock

Dave’s “Hunger For The Great Light” Lyrics

I want to be your hunger
I want to see you open wide
I want to go down for you
I want to blow your mind – “Hunger For The Great

Outkast’s “Hootie Hoo” Lyrics

Follow the funk from the skunk
And the dank that is crunk in the Dungeon
It goes on and on and on, like that
Going out to the Jeeps and hoes in the ‘llac

Dave’s “Shake Me Like A Monkey” Lyrics

I like my coffee with toast and jelly
But I’d rather be licking from your back to your belly

Dr Dre’s “Bitches ain’t shit but hoes and tricks…” Lyrics

uhm… I am pretty sure that one speaks for itself.

So… do you get my point???

and… for your (AND MY) listening pleasure… yum

 

In case you need more reasons as to why I love this man and his band so much…

9 Dave Matthews Band Songs that Are Definitely About Going Down on Women